*E.L.Fudge Cookies and Strawberry Twizzlers.
**Me and my mom.
Wait, Penelope Cruz wore a dress that was strapless and kind of fish tailed?!! SHE NEVER DOES THAT!!! MY MIND IS BLOWN!!!
I wasn't sure about this dress last night, but today I have decided I like it. This decision may be related to my lesbian crush on Rachel McAdams.
In theory I should like this dress, it is sparkly and it fits her well. But alas, it leaves me cold. Maybe because it's not really her style? And her hair is too beauty pageant.
Looking at this dress from top to bottom my thoughts were as follows: Yay sparkles. Hmm weird waist. Oh it's purple. Holy mother of - what is going on.
Too much. Too much is going on.
It's official. I am over the giant ruffle dresses. Stop it.
I feel like a lot of people were wearing the fleshy pinkish colors last night, which I don't love.
Another fleshy color this time with added bonus of Chiquita Banana Girl giant ruffle train.
I cannot get on board with this, it reminds me of those airbrush t-shirts at Seaworld. The very t-shirts I used to covet when I was little; but that is neither here nor there.
So you are a millionaire and you're going to the Academy Awards and you have access to any designer in the world at your fingertips and you think, "You know what? I'm going to wear a dress with giant rose boobs. Yes rose boobs. That is the answer."
Put some jewelry on you awkward-on-purpose, weird little person.
Perfection.
Okay, deep breath. One, why is she at the Oscars? Two, she is sixteen correct? When you are sixteen, please keep your boobies put away and stop being whore-tastic. Three, stand up straight.
Dress is pretty, hair is unfortunate.
"This dress does not have enough fabric. Just glue some to my hip. Perfect, thanks."
Just stop existing please.
She always looks really smug to me. She should not feel smug in this dress.
I will give it to her, she is never boring. But if you have a choice between boring and creepy halter dress, maybe go for boring.
I thought this was cute. I am a sucker for gray. But possibly it was purple.
I want to like this, but it's a pillowcase and her hair was frizzed out and maybe she's getting too old for the crazy, risky looks. Let's leave it to the youngins Sarah.
I think they are a cute couple, that is all.
My mom and I had a Matt Damon vs. Ben Affleck debate last night. Ben Affleck won due to the funny factor, you pretty much can get really far with me if you are funny. Like in my pants.
On another note, I've decided Jeff Bridges is 100% sexy.
19 comments:
In regards to J.Lo, two words - Bubble. Wrap.
Looking forward to this post all weekend.
Did not disappoint. Someone needs to send you to the red carpet with a microphone in hand.
Zac Efron, Taylor Lautner, Jake Gylenhall, Ryan Reynolds...now that is what a tuxedo is all about.
"THE DUDE"...very sexy. loved the post love you....dad
you are so good at that game. hilarious & i agree. haha. thank you for being entertaining.
All comments were spot on.
Also laughed heartily to "This decision may be related to my lesbian crush on Rachel McAdams."
i looked forward to this post more than the actual oscars.
This post made me laugh very hard.
I love when you critique the award show dresses. I seriously look forward to award shows for this very reason. You couldn't have been more right. And seriously I think Charlize Theron needs a new stylist. She looks like Madonna from the early 90s. Just instead of cone boobs she went for rose boobs.
I love reading your blog and your dress commentaries, I couldn't agree with you more on these!
LOL, the airbrushed dress commentary was spot on. Like I'm still laughing out loud, lol.
Ok, and if Miley Cyrus wasn't Miley Cyrus you'd think she looked good, right? I mean I hate to admit it, but I thought she looked cute. But agreed, for the 12% of teenage girls that actually have boobs at 16, they should be kept under lock and key.
Did your dad comment on your blog?! I love it! Welcome John.
PS. When did you decide that Jeff Bridges was sexy?
LOLOLOL I wish I watched with you guys. The cinnaboobs were ridiculous, and sorry Caca, I don't like your lover Rachel's faded drapes dress. :( She is lovely tho.
I have always liked Jeff B. Watch "The Fabulous Baker Boys".
lol,there is no shame in a good man crush...the dude, very sexy
we love blog stalking you. this made us el oh el.
1. I don't know who the girl is with the giant ruffle dress but she looks like a walking ax wound.
2. Kristen Stewart needs to be tied to a railroad jack.
3. Hated Sandra Bullocks dress. It looks sloppy and too long.
4. JLo, is that a dress or an incubator curtain?
agree Jeff Bridges = hotness
lol to Mariah needs to stop existing. She is gross and never looks good.
yes please go be a red carpet commentator!!
Dear Erica AKA Tartraz,
When it's 5:44 am and the hubs has driven me from our marriage bed with his horrendous snoring, I know you'll be there for me with your hilarious posts and oh-so-true commentary on life. Thanks for making this ungodly hour totally worth it.
P.S. Jeff Bridges is so freaking sexy.
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